How can we handle conflict with difficult people?
That’s a question that is asked frequently by many. For the most part, humans have been in conflict since the beginning of time. It’s something that predates our ancestors, so the question I am most often asked is “how do you deal with difficult people”?
This is something that took me a while to learn and understand, once you become in tune with your emotions you’ll be better able to navigate your way around “difficult people and conflict”
Having a better inner standing of other people’s projections and how they react to others will be the key in dealing with conflict.
We tend to lash out at others because of our own internal struggles and battles, we, as human beings become extremely reactive when we are tense and are dealing with issues. Becoming perceptive to the energies that others give out will give you an easy inclination on how to proceed in times of conflict.
Keeping your cool will solve the other person’s reaction toward you, when you are in a calm state it’s very difficult for someone who is agitated to lash out. Remaining cool, calm and collected will show the other person that the energy they are bringing to you is, simply put “not affecting you”
Here are some simple ways to remain calm when approached with conflict
- Breathe- maintaining a calm breath will assist you in keeping your vibration steady.
- Focus- when you place your focus on the person and not the problem you’ll have a glimpse into the solution.
- Don’t engage- engaging in back and forth banter never ends well.
- Keep your distance- maintaining a safe space between you and the other person aids in feeling safe in the space you’re in.
- Talk it out- Listen to what the other person has to say, hear them out without interrupting, actually listen without responding until the other person is done.
- Apologize- If the conflict started because of something you did, an apology is always necessary.
- Laugh it out- Once the issue has been resolved, laugh and hug it out.
- Love- most people are dealing with unresolved traumas and problems we know nothing about, remaining kind, compassionate and loving will help resolve the conflict.
I’ve found it easier that instead of focusing on the problem, I look for solutions. I know it’s easier to dwell on problems but know that problems can all be solved if we look for ways to undertake these tasks. It will make us more emotionally intelligent in the long run. The key is to acknowledge that not every action requires a reaction out of you. Not taking things personally will also help you sustain a level headed view of conflict.
Remember everyone is doing the best they can and we don’t know what is going on in people’s personal lives.